Rx For Parenting Today

Eating Problems in Little Children

Some children are picky eaters from the time they start solid food. Others children eat anything put in front of them and are a delight to feed. I had one of each! When parents worry that a child may starve if they don't cater to their every whim, trouble lies ahead. Unless a child has an eating disorder, celiac disease, or serious allergies, they are not going to starve if food is available. My advice to parents has always been to put tasty, colorful food in small portions in front of the picky eater and then if the meal is not eaten to get the child down from the table. After a few missed meals, kids will begin to eat what is put before them.

One problem that often arises is when  parents let a child fill up on milk or eat a lot of snacks between meals. Milk should just be available at mealtime and no snack, except perhaps for apple juice, given between meals. When a parent tells me a child is having trouble with meals, I have always asked them to keep a three day list of everything the child eats and mail it to me. I have seen some astounding lists. One little boy was a very picky eater and his pediatrician thought his lack of strength was due to a muscle weakness. He was a sickly looking little boy, but on listening to the single mother's very busy schedule, I suspected some changes needed to be made. The family lived on fast food. The three days list of food was astounding. I suggested the mother do shopping and meal planning on the weekends and get the children involved in planning the meals. After two to three weeks, the little boy was eating much better and the whole family felt better. I cured the suspected muscle disease by listening to what what going on in the family. We do reflect what we eat.

Suggestions to Help with Sleeping for Children with Autism

A mother asked me today if I had  suggestions about how she could get her six-year-old with autism to sleep at night. He misses many days of school because he cannot get to sleep and his school is getting upset. I asked her several questions about what goes on in the evening at her house. First, I wanted to know what the boy ate for dinner. Because he is so sensitive about food, the boy doesn't eat a lot of protein and does not drink milk. Instead, drinks with lots of sugar are consumed. I suggested scrambled eggs should be acceptable or some other good protein and  a calcium supplement and daily vitamin is needed. Limiting  scary films is important or those that get the boy excited. A warm bath, a story and some warm cocoa, made without milk might work for the child. His doctor  suggested benadryl, but that leaves him groggy the next morning, the mother said. A smaller dose or another medicine might be needed. Loud TV in the rest of the house should be watched and the temperature of the room is also important to check. A room that is too warm or too cold can make a difference. Usually, a regular routine about bedtime works the best and it is important that a child gets enough exercise during the day. I also asked the mother to send me a three day list of everything the little boy eats to see if I could make some suggestions. What children eat can make a difference in their daily lives and sleeping.

Special Education-Charter Schools and Vouchers

Now that Trump and Betsy DeVos are pushing charter schools and vouchers, parents of kids with special needs must be very alert about problems that can develop. An important article in yesterday's New York Times by Dana Goldstein points out the major problems that can arise. Once parents of a child with special needs decide to use a voucher for a charter or religious school, their child will no longer be protected by the federal IDEA law. This law states that a child with special needs must be given the best possible education despite their disability and that parents have the right to question aspects of the program that is provided or not provided and dispute any disciplinary action against their child. One parent who found out the hard way is quoted in the article as saying" I never in a million years thought that in this private educational setting my child would not be protected by state and federal law." On-line schools for kids with special needs are the worst because there is no way a child with a learning disability for example can receive the help that is needed. One-to-one time with a special learning teacher is needed and what must be provided if it noted in the IEP or Individual Education Plan. (I have attended many for my patients to be sure their needs were being met.) IEPs are not required in many schools where parents use vouchers or in charter schools. So the idea of being able to chose a school for your child may be a very bad idea unless you do careful research, lots of networking, and read the fine print.

Child Abuse-Emotional, Physical and or Sexual

Child abuse is sadly wide spread. Some children are abused emotionally, some physically and emotionally and some sexually. There are children who suffer from all three kinds of abuse. How anyone could hurt a little child is beyond my understanding. Yet I have had ten long-time friends tell me of the abuse they suffered as children. All of these individuals have paid a high price for the abuse and it is reflected in the choices they have made as adults. 

Some of the parents were bright professionals. Others were individuals who themselves may have been abused as children. It has been well established that a child who was abused may become an abuser as an adult. Anyone who was abused as a child and is making the decision whether or not to have children would be wise to get some counseling before the decision is made.

The statistics for child sexual abuse are terrifying and are from the National Sexual Violence Resource Center. One in four girls and one in six boys will be sexually abused before they become 18. 34% of those who sexually abuse a child are family members. One-third of the women who were abused will be raped as an adult. 96% of those who sexually abuse children are male. It is also well established that the majority of prostitutes were sexually abused as children. Children are often threatened that something will happen to them if they tell of the abuse and some children think they did something wrong, so they were abused physically or sexually. 

Will Trump and Betsy Devos Destroy Special Education in Public Schools?

I was talking to a grandmother of an autistic grandson the other day. She startled me by saying the public school the seven-year-old attends is threatening to discontinue all IEPs.(Individual Education programs.) These are the planning sessions required by Federal law for children with special needs. I have attended many for my patients.These meetings are crucial to set up the yearly plan for what each student needs. For example, a child who is slow to speak should have speech therapy several times a week. A child with cerebral palsy or other neuromuscular problems will need physical and probably occupational therapy. If the school cannot provide these, the school district must pay for outside services.

Betsy Devos in her confirmation hearings to become the Secretary of Education knew nothing about special education in the public schools. She wants to give parents vouchers for  private schools,preferably those that are Christian, such as she and her children attended. She did not know that special education in the public schools is under Federal law. States are required to meet minimum regulations for special education to receive Federal funds. Each state has different requirements for special education. In his proposed budget, Trump has listed a nine billion dollar cut to special education funds. Of course, he can afford to send his son to a private school, as can his wealthy supporters.

I think parents whose children need special education in public schools should be aware of what is going on in the Trump administration and be prepared to fight for their children. Pressure by parents on their state and federal representatives can have a real impact. Special education funds must not be withdrawn and a voucher system for private schools is not the answer for children, particularly those with special needs. They do not have the personnel to provide what is needed.