I have often been asked by parents what they should do when they discover or are told by school personnel that a child of theirs has hurt another child, lied or been a bully. The first thing I always did was to ask that I do a physical examination. Sometimes I could find neurological signs that were troubling and often just talking with a child I could get an idea of what was going wrong in their lives. Often a child feels others are picking on him or her and he or she just wants to fight back. Often there is a deeper problem and for that I needed the help of a child psychologist or psychiatrist. It always surprised me at some of the things that were found. Sometimes a marked learning disability was found or the child was being bullied by a sibling or someone at their school. In rare cases it was a deep psychiatric problem. Medication was usually not needed, but was in some cases. Ongoing counseling was often a must. It can be hard to find just the right specialist to test or counsel a child and I was fortunate to have several professionals I could call on.
Children who stutter, have a physical disability, or other problems have told me how they were often bullied, called "crip" or their speech mimicked. Some administrators tell teachers they should not make more than two or three referrals for children in trouble because of budget considerations. I have had to fight with several principals in order to get help for patients. Frequently, I used my Center's grant dollars to pay for testing or treatment. If a child is in trouble a way must be found to get the child the help they need. Otherwise there could be long-term consequences.
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